A wise man had once said that everything in the Universe appeals only in balance. In my 33 years of experience till now, I find this very much true. Anything out of the range starts to trouble, be it with the hormones or even with emotions.

Everyone craves for a helping hand, even if they do not need it. When someone offers their help, you feel like gracing it with all sincerity and want to say thank you, Isn’t It?

But at times when someone lends a helping hand, you feel like giving a funny or even a sarcastic reply because either you are not expecting it or you know that it’s a formality rather than willingness on their part to offer you help. Maybe they are truly wanting to help you but their extra niceness can be overwhelming. This is true for some of our friends and relatives. In such moments, you feel like diluting their extra niceness by giving some hilarious reply to “How Can I Help You”. But that is easier said than done because the aim is not just to give a funny answer but also to not hurt their sentiment.

That is exactly the purpose of this post. We want to give you plenty of good-hearted intent funny replies in such a scenario so that you both can share laughter on it.

Really? I may ask something way out of your league. Hope you will not take a U- Turn!: – This is a reply to catch your friend off-guard. It would make him pleasantly surprised. But beware that you are also planting a seed of doubt in their mind with this reply. A doubt that you could really ask something that they won’t be able to afford and then they might feel bad about it. But in most scenarios, you really don’t need to think twice before shooting this reply.

Hmm. How come the sun is rising from the West today?

Its a reply that describes a pleasant surprise. A surprise of your friend willingly asking to help you out. Use it on someone who you think has never shown intention to help you previously.

Out of willingness or out of formality?: – This is a bit sarcastic reply that surely will surprise them. You can use it jokingly on people who are very close to you or the ones you are acquaintances only.

I need to train my dog to bite you. Could you help me with that?: – Well, there is always someone in our circle who talks of doing everything he can but doesn’t deliver even 1/10th of it. Their constant asking of helping you out actually causes more frustation than hope because deep down we know that he can’t fulfill the help for which he is showing so much enthusiasm. For them you could use this reply, ofcourse in a very light-hearted tone.

Could you turn all days of the week to Sunday?

Dog Credits : – Unsplash

Can you bear just this one night with me farting?

I just need a million. Can you help me with that?

Can you do a moonwalk for me?

Flirty Reply to How Can I Help You

By coming in my dreams every night!: – Ideally, you should reply this to your female friend with whom you share excellent rapport and comfort level. You may also use it on a waitress, caterer or hospitality workers. Beware that using it might lead to trouble too!

Could you just talk and talk and talk!

Thank you for asking. I feel so much better because of it!

I have been thinking about someone like you all day!

I want to kiss the hands of the God who created you : – Here you are clearly expressing that you find the other person extremely attractive and that you wish to see them romantically.


Its not everyday that you get a chance to reply something funny and flirty for How Can I Help You. While your aim is to have a good laughter, care needs to be taken that your friend don’t take it as an offense.